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Len Brennan
Bishop Leonard 'Len' Brennan is one of (if not the) main antagonists of the sitcom ''Father Ted'','' alongside Father Dick Byrne. He is the short-tempered boss of Father's Ted, Dougal and Jack and was the one responsible for their banishment to the Craggy Island (although his reasons were justified). Brennan holds a deep hatred for all three priests and does his best to avoid them, especially Ted. Whenever he does see the necessity to grace them with his presence, his arrival is dreaded by both parties. Ted particularly seems fearful of Brennan and does his best to avoid angering the Bishop. Brennan was played by Irish actor Jim Norton. Personality Brennan is a foul-mouthed, lecherous, hypocritical and sometimes violent narcissistic bishop, who frequently abuses his power. Despite his high position in the Catholic Church, Brennan has forsaken his vow of celibacy and has a secret family in California. Due to an incident in New York, Brennan also possesses intense leporiphobia (a fear of rabbits). Brennan despises Ted, Dougal and Jack mainly because of the problems they have caused him in the past; such as Ted stealing charity money and losing it all to gambling, Dougal causing an incident that permanently damaged several nuns and Jack with his obvious alcoholism, violence and horrible attitude, which caused a disastrous wedding. He makes no effort to hide his distaste for them and frequently refers to the three of them with insulting names. These include The Three Stooges and the cast of Police Academy. He once explicitly referred to Dougal as This Cabbage and Father Jack as The Kraken. He is frequently shown to have a short temper, as demonstrated when Dougal repeatedly addresses him by name rather than title. Whilst, for the most part, he is content to vent his anger verbally, Brennan will get violent if pushed too far. In the episode ''Kicking Bishop Brennan Up The Arse, Ted, after losing a bet to Dick Byrne, is ordered to kick Brennan's backside as punishment. Ted manages to complete the deed, but Brennan (whilst on a trip to Rome to visit the Pope) returns to Craggy Island at the same time shoving the Pope to the ground and kicks Ted back in revenge. Brennan is greatly feared by Ted, but not so much by dim-witted Dougal. Jack treats the Bishop with contempt, apologising to Brennan with a huge amount of sarcasm, and outright hitting him after telling the Bishop to "feck off." Despite this, Brennan occasionally shows concern for Ted, on the occasions where Ted injures himself by jumping down the stairs and out of the window respectively, he asks if he is alright and if Ted is in need of an ambulance. Role in the Series Brennan appeared in three episodes, one for each season, The Passion of St Tibulus, The[[The Plague| Plague]] and Kicking Bishop Brennan Up The Arse. He served as the main antagonist of all three episodes. He was also briefly mentioned in ''Think Fast, Father Ted'' and Escape from Victory. '' ''The Passion of St Tibulus Bishop Leonard Brennan was first mentioned by Ted to a visiting priest (Father Hernandez) as their boss. He also mentioned that according to rumour Brennan had broken his vow of celibacy and that he had a secret son living in somewhere in America. Brennan telephoned not long after to inform Ted (or more accurately shout at him over the phone) that he would be visiting Craggy Island the very next day. A clearly annoyed Brennan arrived at the Parochial House shortly after Father Hernandez's departure. Despite clear warnings not to do so, Dougal brought up the issue of Brennan's secret family, which enraged the Bishop further. He was subsequently pressured into accepting a cup of tea from Mrs. Doyle (when she would not stop pressuring him to take one) and almost came to blows with Jack when the latter told him to "feck off". Ted, in a desperate bid, to keep things civil, asked about the purpose of the visit, wondering/hoping that Brennan intended to send them back to their mainland parishes. Brennan made it very clear that that was not the case and provided some hint as to why the priests live in such a desolate location: * Jack was involved in a scandalous wedding in Athlone, which Jack (if his reaction is anything to go by) has fond memories of. Brennan makes it clear he will never allow Jack an opportunity like that again. * Ted stole money from a charity that was intended to fund a sickly child's visit to Lourdes. Ted used a portion of that money to go to Las Vegas, and eventually lost the rest of it gambling. Brennan states clearly that Ted will remain on Craggy Island until all of the lost funds are accounted for. * As for Dougal, or as Brennan refers to him, "This cabbage", The Bishop says there is no way in hell, he is ever letting him go free again, especially after something called "The Black Rock incident", Exactly what happened is not known, but from the descriptions provided Dougal left a group of Nuns lives "irreparably damaged". The situation was serious enough that the Vatican almost got involved. Brennan immediately turns the conversation away from this and explains the true purpose of his visit. A new film was recently released on Craggy island called The Passion of St Tibulus. After watching the film, The Pope considered it blasphemous, immediately banning any and all showings of the film. However, due to some unexplained loop-hole, the film can be shown on Craggy Island. As such Brennan was called back from his holiday in California in order to do something about it. He orders the priests to make a protest about the film. When Ted tries to object, Brennan tells him to shut up and do as he is told. Ted and Dougal do as instructed, although their initial attempts involve visiting the cinema, watching the film, and protesting afterwards. The film itself according to Ted and Dougal made absolutely no sense and was not particularly popular. There were only two other people at the viewing with Ted and Dougal (plus a dog), and one left after learning the movie was subtitled not dubbed. Content to lay in the following morning, Brennan shows up and orders the three priests to go down to the cinema and protest throughout the day, even though the film does not show until late in the afternoon. During this time Brennan is revealed to have lost his travelling bag, which was stolen by Jack, who had ignored Brennan's instructions. Unfortunately, Ted and Dougal's actions have the opposite effect. Their protest draws attention to the film, and people flock to the cinema to find out what all the fuss is about. The three priests then have to contend with an angry Brenan later that evening, following the end of their protest. The Bishop has brought a globe with him, and a modified poster for the film. Here Brennan verifies that thanks to Ted and Dougal's bungling The Passion of St Tibulus has now become the most successful film ever shown on Craggy Island and that people were coming from as far away as Poland to see the film. Brennan then explained that as punishment for their actions, he (probably with the backing of the Vatican) intended to banish all three priests to a number of carefully chosen locations, which he clearly viewed to be even worse than Craggy Island. * Ted is to be exiled to an island off the coast of Surinam, South America, where two tribes had been "knocking the shit out of each other since 1907". Brennan could barely contain his glee at this and when Ted tried to decline, offhandedly asked if Ted knew how to make arrows, indicating that he intends to send Ted to his doom in middle of the cross-fire between two warring tribes. * Dougal was going to be sent to somewhere in the Philippines, one that did not have a proper sewerage system, which would no doubt lead to the death of the naive young priest from nasty diseases. * The place of Jacks exile is never revealed. Jack had fallen asleep, and ignoring a warning from Ted, Brennan made the mistake of waking Jack up by shouting in his face. With a loud cry of "FECK OFF!" Jack responded by punching the Bishop hard in the face, leaving Brennan with a bloodied (possibly broken) nose. Brennan immediately left, presumably to get medical treatment but vowed to make sure that Jacks new parish would be hell on earth. Ultimately, Brennan was forced to change his mind. When rummaging through the bishops travelling bag earlier, Jack found a video containing footage of Brennan visiting his girlfriend and son (as well as a bottle of whiskey). The episode ends with Ted, Dougal and Jack delightedly watching the said video a second time, knowing they could use it to blackmail the Bishop into letting them remain on Craggy Island, in exchange for their silence. Think Fast, Father Ted Although Brennan did not appear in this episode, he was central to the plot. Ted contacted the Bishop in order to get permission and ask for a prize for a local raffle (to repair a leak in the parochial house). Brennan gave Ted the go-ahead and sent over a Blue Rover 213 as the grand prize, which cost £7000. Ted ended up accidentally destroying this car after Dougal noticed a small dent in the bonnet, following an earlier collision with a cyclist. This sent Ted into a justifiable panic as he knew Brennan would kill him if he ever discovered what happened. Ultimately Ted and Dougal were forced to rig the raffle, in order to as Ted put it "save the Bishops soul" but were dealt karmic retribution anyway. The Plague Bishop Brennan telephoned at the start of the episode, following an incident with Jack who had been found sleepwalking around the island naked at night. This was not a one-time occurrence and during the most recent incident, the elderly priest unintentionally crossed paths with a close friend of Brennan's who was out walking in the woods with his family. Brennan was sitting in the bath throughout the duration of the phone call. Unfortunately, Ted on Brennan's bad side from the get-go. Upon learning who was on the other end of the line, Ted unintentionally swore by saying "Oh feck". Ted only made the situation worse by pretending Brennan had dialled the wrong number and hanging up on him. Brennan immediately called back, prompting Ted to (badly) feigning ignorance, claiming he must have dialed the wrong number, which did not amuse Brennan. Deciding to get to the point for both their sakes, Brennan explained what had happened to his friend with Jack, who was reportedly "wearing only a pair of socks and a hat". The Bishop stated he would visit later that week to check things were in order on Craggy Island. Before ending the call Brennan threatened violence against Ted if he ever tried to lie to him like that again. As he hung up the phone Brennan was joined in the bath by a naked woman. Brennan's visit, however, could not have been more badly timed. Dougal had recently purchased a pet rabbit, which he eventually named Sampras, after tennis player, Pete Sampras. Ted explained that they'd need to hide the rodent since Bishop Brennan had a deep fear for rabbits following an incident in New York. Through inexplicable reasons, Brennan had somehow ended up trapped in a lift with several of the rabbits who eventually started nibbling at his cape and everything. Even more strangely, in the lead up to the Bishops visit, the parochial house suddenly experienced an unexplained rabbit infestation. Dozens of bunny rabbits appeared as if from nowhere, and for some reason developed a habit of following Father Jack wherever he went. Despite several attempts by Ted and Dougal to get rid of the rodents, the infestation remained, and when Brennan eventually arrived, they were forced to simply try and hide their long-eared friends for the duration of the visit. When the Bishop arrived, Ted gave him a tour of the house, showing him the extensive measures taken to prevent Jack from escaping in a state of undress again. These included a caged bed, barbed wire, straight jacket pyjamas, a rope and a tracking device. Although reassured, Brennan's content for the priests was still referenced. He especially did not like Dougal referring to him as Len, instead of your Grace. Mrs Doyle almost gave the game away, by bringing in food and water for a rabbit, which Ted accepted, before offering to clean the Bishops car. Although he turned this down, she was revealed to have already done extensive damage to the car having already snapped off the wipers (in order to wash them), breaking the side window in the process, and put petrol in a diesel engine. The eagle-eyed Brennan also noticed obvious signs of rabbits, a cage full of cabbage and straw, and droppings on the floor. Ted managed to cover these up, claiming the lettuce was simply grown indoors, and the poop was in fact spilt caviar. After buying these stories, Brennan retired for the night. With the Bishop gone, Ted asked as to the location of the bunnies, who were hidden by Dougal. The young priest said he had hidden the rabbits in the last place anyone would expect to find them. Following a bit of detective work, Ted quickly realised that the ignorant Dougal had stupidly hidden them in the Bishops bedroom. In order to avoid the extreme temptation of hitting Dougal, Ted tore after the Bishop. Trying to delay the Bishop from entering the room for as long as possible, Ted proceeded to give Brennan a speech of admiration, threw himself down the stairs and even blocked the door to the bedroom. These things did little to stall the Bishop, who made his hatred of Ted perfectly clear. Brennan also shouted profanity at Dougal when the latter did not address him by his title, ordering "You address me by my proper title, you little bollocks". Ted managed to trick the Bishop into allowing him to inspect the room first, by claiming he needed the toilet. Upon finding the room empty, Ted allowed Brennan inside. Upon entering the bedroom, a confused Brennan looked around the room, before saying "But there's no toilet in here!" The rabbits, it turned out, had somehow crossed the hall and now occupied Jacks room. Left with no other choice Ted and Dougal tried to gather up the rabbits, and move them as far away as possible. Before they could even make one run, Jack despite all of the security measures managed to break free began another nude sleep-walk. The two younger priests, who had started in Jacks bathroom, emerged to find the room empty. Stepping out into the hall, they spotted a rabbit making its way into Bishop Brennan's room. They entered through the open door as quickly as possible and tried to gather up as many of the rabbits as possible. Woken by the commotion, Bishop Brennan turned on his bedroom light - only to get the shock of his life! The room was by now filled to bursting point with rabbits, with Ted and Dougal carrying another two each. To add insult to injury, a butt naked Father Jack was revealed to be lying in the same bed next to Brennan. Terrified, and confused Brennan turned to Ted, who assured him it was all just a bad dream and would be over soon enough. A desperate Brennan readily accepted this proclamation, and laid back down again, only to sit bolt upright again a few seconds later and scream to high heaven. Escape from Victory Bishop Brennan was mentioned at the end of the episode, setting the stage for his return in the following episode. During the episode, Ted and his arch-rival Dick Byrne organised an all priests over 75's football match. To make things more interesting, they used the forfeit system, which meant that whoever loses had to carry out a dare from the other party. Although Ted's team wins, Dougal's actions caused the referee to realise that Ted had cheated causing his team to be disqualified and himself subjected to the forfeit. As a result of Ted being "such a big cheating bastard", Dick prepares what he describes an "extra special forefit". Ted is understandably nervous, although Dougal tries to reassure him that it will probably be something humiliating but simple. This all changes when he opens the envelope, however, and is so stunned by what he reads that he can barely speak. Dougal tries to explain Ted's punishment but all he can say is that he has to carry out the forfeit within a week and not what it actually is. In the end, Ted snatches the paper from Dougal, reads it and then proclaims in horror that he has to; "Kick Bishop Brennan up the arse!" This revelation causes Ted to go into shock, Mrs Doyle to drop her teapot, Dougal to faint and Jack (who had been asleep through the episode) to wake up in horror. Kicking Bishop Brennan Up The Arse In his final appearance, Bishop Brennan is tricked into visiting Craggy Island by Father Dick Byrne, who claims that a likeness of the Bishop can be seen in the skirting boards. The Bishop is extremely excited by this and does not realise he is walking into a trap staged by Byrne in order for Ted to carry out his forfeit from the previous episode. Ted is understandably horrified by the prospect of doing so, as he knows Brennan will not hesitate to punish him, either by killing Ted, or sending him somewhere where he is bound to get killed. This would later be verified by Brennan. Brennan arrives the following day accompanied by his new assistant Father Jessup, the most sarcastic priest in all of Ireland. Dougal immediately gets on the Bishops nerves, by once again referring to him by name rather than title. Although keen to see the likeness, Brennan notes that they cannot stay long, as he is due to visit the Pope in Rome the very next day. This gives Ted only a very short window of opportunity in which to carry out the forfeit. To make matters worse, Dougal must take a photograph to prove that Ted isn't lying about fulfilling the forfeit. The group makes its way into the spare room, where Ted manages to trick Brennan into position. Before he can carry out the act though, Jessup looks up forcing Ted to jump out of the window, much to Brennan and Jessop's confusion. Heading downstairs Brennan declares that they didn't see anything and that the whole thing was a waste of time. As the Bishop and his assistant prepare to leave Mrs Doyle arrives and informs everybody that due to adverse weather the roads have been taken in leaving Brennan stranded on the island for the night, which both he and Ted are equally unhappy about. That night Ted tells Dougal he can't bring himself to carry out the forfeit as Brennan is just too scary. Dougal, however, come up with a surprisingly ingenious idea; telling Ted to use that fear to his advantage. Brennan knows that Ted is scared of him, and would not believe for an instant that Ted would actually do physical harm to the Bishop. He, therefore, suggests Ted should just kick Brennan and then act as if nothing happened. Convinced by this Ted jumps out of bed and proclaims that he will carry out the forfeit. Woken by this Brennan orders Ted to be quiet, shouting so loudly that the walls start shaking. Ted and Dougal promptly hide under the covers. The next morning Ted convinces Brennan to take one last look at the likeness before departing. As Father Jessup gets into a confrontation, and later imprisoned in Jacks underpants hamper by the elderly resident of Craggy Island, Ted gestures to the boards. There Brennan spots a badly painted portrait of a man wearing as bishops hat, and once again kneels into position. This time, with an almighty BAM, Ted carries out the forfeit. As suggested, he then acts as if nothing had happened, treating the situation normally. Brennan, meanwhile, goes into a state of shock and does not seem to immediately register what just happened. He is led out of the room, and eventually the house, with a noticeable limp. Throughout his subsequent taxi journey, airport check-in and flight, Brennan maintains a look of shock on his face and is virtually unresponsive, either ignoring any questions or giving slurred barely legible responses. It is not until he is standing in front of the Pope that Brennan finally emerges from his trance. As the Pope goes to shake hands with him, Brennan looks to the said hand, back at the Pope, before shouting "He Ted did kick me up the arse!" He then shoves the Pope and his assistant out of the way, knocking the former to the ground, much to the shock of everyone. Rushing to the nearest phone, Brennan tells the operator to get him on the first plane back to Ireland. He then shoots a menacing look at the Bishops and Cardinals, asking what they are looking at. Whilst the aftermath of this incident is not shown it is possible that this incident landed Brennan in deep trouble, thus adding further fuel to the flame. The next morning, Ted who got blind drunk the previous evening, as a celebration for managing to carry out his forfeit hears the sound of a car pulling up, accompanied by the sound of the car's horn. Looking out the window, Ted sees an enraged Brennan charging up the lawn shrieking angrily at the top of his lungs, cape billowing behind him (giving the impression of a demon out of hell). Knowing full well what is about to happen, Ted panics and eventually tries to hide under the bed. Brennan meanwhile, kicks in both the front door and the door to the master bedroom screeching "Crilly!" at the top of his voice. He quickly discovers Ted cowering under his bed, which he promptly turns over. A clearly nervous Father Ted greets the Bishop, asking about the reason for this surprise visit. The Bishop sarcastically lists off a number of false excuses (fresh air, company, a fantastic view), before claiming his top priority is sorting out the issue of Ted kicking him up the ass. He subsequently grabs Ted by the scruff, lifts the priest to his feet and pins him against the wall. Remembering Dougal's advice, Ted calms down enough to feign ignorance. Brennan initially doesn't believe a word of this but after a while, admits as Dougal said that even he finds it a bit farfetched Ted would do such a thing. Ted assures him that he did imagine it, before swearing to God, and everything that he holds did he did not boot the Bishop up the backside. Eventually, a confused Brennan starts to leave, with Ted seeing him off and for a brief second, it looks as though Ted is actually going to get away with it. Unfortunately, Dougal turns up at that moment. Whilst drunk, Ted told Dougal to get copies of the photograph for his friends, and a ten by ten one for himself. Although Ted manages to conceal the two hundred smaller copies on his person, Dougal misinterpreting the instructions bought a ten-foot by ten-foot version of the picture for Ted. As such, when Bishop Brennan turns around to bid Ted goodbye, he sees the enlarged portrait in all its glory resting against the side of the house. Thus Brennan realises that not only did Ted kick him up the arse, but that he also lied to the Bishop, and almost managed to convince Brennan into thinking that he was going crazy. Knowing the truth, Brennan beckons Ted towards him, waiting until he is sufficiently far enough from the house before making him turn around, whereupon Ted spots the large portrait. Found out, Ted looks around in horror, seeing the now angry Bishop bearing down on him. Ted flees for his life, a seething Brennan in hot pursuit. Ted does not get far though. He trips over in the mud a short distance from the house, landing on all fours and barely has enough time to look over his shoulder as the Bishop closes the distance. With a massive THUD Bishop Brennan returns the favour, booting Ted hard up the backside, catapulting him several feet in the air. What happened after this is unknown. Trivia *He has a massive fear of rabbits which stems from him being trapped in a lift with them *He also has a young son with an unnamed young woman but they live in America *It is revealed that the reason why Jack greatly hates Brennan is that he was chosen to be a Bishop, instead of Jack. This is also one of the factors, besides his exile that causes Jack to descend into extreme alcoholism. Category:Characters Category:Males Category:Characters seen naked Category:Antagonists Category:Bishops